I would rather be normal, go to school normal hours and have normal exams. Opposed to writing a paper for my class and hoping that my writing skills which are far from good are good enough to let me pass the class. I just looked at my schedule for when I was going to school to see when my next classes were and stuff like that. Well. I have classes straight through June of 2010. I don't even have a summer break. Which means during ARMSAC I'm going to be doing homework three nights a week, at least. Of course my homework during ARMSAC is easy I'll be in math and diversity classes then. I'm good at math and diversity shouldn't be a problem. But at the beginning, and for a majority of ARMSAC I'll be in Physcology and Life Science. I don't want to have to spend hours away from you guys doing homework. Of course if I was with you guys it would take just as long but still. I don't know I kind of feel like this isn't for me. I was never cut out for college. I never will be. Yea I kind of want to be a teacher but i'd be much happier just doing something artistic for a change, sewing, drawing anything really. As long as it doesn't mean school. I can't tell my grandparents I want to quit it. Because if I do they will kick me out of the house and I have no where to go. I want to do something wiht my life, it's just not someting that most people want to teach me, or have me be taught.
I want to learn how to draw faces on people and have them look okay, opposed to looking like well weird monsters.
I want to learn how to play guitar and read music, because even after a year in band/chorus I still can't and I think that hurts my singing.
I want to be able to paint things that matter to other people, to know that what i'm painting means something to someone, even when it means nothing to me.
I just want so much.
But you don't always get what you want.
xoxo
Stephani
I want to learn how to draw faces on people and have them look okay, opposed to looking like well weird monsters.
I want to learn how to play guitar and read music, because even after a year in band/chorus I still can't and I think that hurts my singing.
I want to be able to paint things that matter to other people, to know that what i'm painting means something to someone, even when it means nothing to me.
I just want so much.
But you don't always get what you want.
xoxo
Stephani
2 comments:
I would love to learn how to play guitar and read music as well chica.
Normally in this situation I would say talk to your grandparents. Let them know how you feel...although I'm sure you already thought of that. My advice would still be do that. They may just surprise you.
Or we could always figure out a way for you, me and Ashley...and possibly Mel maybe...to move in together.
oh hun i know exactly how you feel.
i've always dreamed of going to college, becoming a teacher and being happy that way.
but now i think that someway i'd love to work in music. that it's what i'm destined for.
life sucks when you're pulled one way but forced to go another, huh?
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